Saltgrass **June 9, 2012**

The Saltgrass restaurant in Colorado Springs barely even deserves a post. I am only writing this to warn off any red blooded Americans (and non Americans, I suppose) from wasting even a penny at this horrible establishment. This place was by far the worst restaurant I've eaten at this, or any other year. Here's why: 1. I ordered a beer...waited...no beer. Asked the waiter that brought our salads to check on the status of said beer...waited...still no beer. 2. Ordered a porter house steak to split with my Dad. What we got was a larger version of their Ribeye. The waitress tried to convince me that it was in fact a porter house. I am no butcher but I'm also not 5. I know what we got and it was a rip off. 3. There was a large very prominent black hair on my plate. YUCK!! We told the manager of our unhappiness and he comped half of the "porterhouse" that we never actually got. At the end of it all, the beer was still on my bill. I have NEVER done this, but we left 0 tip and an explanation of why on their comment card. Ok, now I feel like I am re-living the nightmare that is Saltgrass. So, 0 out of 5. Save youself some $ and gnaw on some wood folks. Bleh!

**Bones** June 7, 2012

Ok so clearly I'm playing ketchup here a bit. Ha! Get it? Ok anyway, I need to catch up on some of my restaurant outings over the last few weeks. It's been a whirlwind of planning and parties this past two weeks so I have to dig deep to remember all of the yummy (and some of the not so yummy) things I've indulged in. So, Bones is a small Asian fusion restaurant in a little neighborhood in Denver. I like this area. It's full of non-chain small eateries and bars. The Asian fusion theme however, is everything "Asian fusion" these day!? We used a Scoutmob coupon for our bill and it's a good thing we did because my biggest complaint was the price. We started with some drink. I had the viatnamese coffee which was a mistake. It tasted like watered down iced coffee which is nothing like good viatnamese coffee. My boyfriend ordered some kind of whiskey cocktail which was good if you like whiskey (I dont. Too many college flashbacks involved there). We got 2 of the pork belly buns and 2 of the suckling pig buns. Delish! The pork belly was my favorite as it added a crisp texture to the doughy bun. But again, at $4 each bun, kind of outrageous! For entrees we had two kinds of ramen. The poached lobster with egg which was delicious but very very rich. My mouth was overwhelmed with the taste of butter and lobster which is generally good, but in this case I had to come up for air a few times. We also got the short rib ramen which was more true to the asian fusion theme. The flavors were well developed and varied which each bite. The service at Bones was good. Our waitress was attentive and quick. Overall, I'd rate Bones a 3.5 out of 5. I probably wouldn't return without a big discount but suggest any ramen fans out there to give it a go.

You Snooze you lose

This breakfast hot spot has locations all over the front range and for good reason. It's awesome and wildly successful especially for a place that's only open for breakfast and lunch. Kudos, snooze. Anyone who's been here knows the worst part about this place is the long wait (hence the catchy title of this post). I'll reluctantly admit I've waited a solid 90 minutes for a taste of their sweet concoction of carbs and sugar. They offer free coffe while you wait which is a plus. Every time I've been here which is at least 5 I've tried something different. Their Benedicts are a little odd. This is usually my go-to breakfast grub but snooze is not the place to order this. The one I ordered has so many different flavors that battled each other for the spotlight instead of a delight marriage of deliciousness. The man hole cover sized pancakes here are out of this world! I imagine the chef that comes up with these flavors like red velvet, peanut butter cup, and bacon and caramel is either a 5 year old or possesses a medical marijuana license. Either way, if you're in the mood for something sweet pancakes are the way to go. Just make sure you jog around the restaurant while you wait to shave off some extra calories. Their breakfast pot pie is warm and comforting and the Mexican chilliquilles is a fun twist on a Mexican dish, yet slightly dry. Overall, I give snooze a 4.5 out of 5. If they'd offer some more appealing low-cal options I'd make it a 5.

North: Odell and Potts

So many have you have been asking for me to review another restaurant. Ok, let's be honest- just Curtis, but for my biggest fans, ask and you shall receive! So I know my first post says this is all about Denver eateries, which for the most part it's is. However I'm no caged animal and every now and then I break the rules... That I made. So, I was in fort Collins this weekend; happy birthday Amy! We went to a few local spots and I thought I'd give you the 411, whatever that means. Odell brewing company- if you happen to be lucky enough to live in Colorado or "the napa valley of beer" I highly suggest you visit some breweries. A favorite of mine is new Belgium in fort Collins but since they're booked from now until my 50th birthday we went to Odell. The tour itself isn't something to write home (or blog) about. Hops, barley, big machinery, big numbers, yada yada yada. They did however give us a taste of their summer ale which I did like. We sat in their small tap room and sampled both the pilot and co-pilot beer flights. There were some gems in the mix but after tasting 12 beers they all start to taste the same. All in all, it's a must-do for any beer fan like myself. 4 out of 5 for breweries. CB and Potts- anyone who has ever lived in fort Collins has likely been to this sports bar and grill at least once. The decor is much like any other bar aside from the giant shark hanging from the ceiling. The beers here are good too but I wouldn't expect much else from a college bar. This point in the evening was preceded by the brewery tour and a margarita happy hour at the house so my main goal was to build a beer dam, not to eat top quality food and give a thoughtful review. The service here was under par. When my boyfriend asked if the onion rings were hand dipped or breaded she asked what the difference was! Only the world, silly child! She was slow and generally confused but we got through dinner without a hitch. We shared the Reuben burger and loaded waffle fries. While not waist line friendly, these items were pretty decent for bar food. The burger was a bit heavy for me and lacked dressing and the bun was a little dance but again, beer damn, not award winning meal. Anyway, I wasn't really over-whelmed or under whelmed here. After spending many a Sunday there in my college years playing beer pong and snacking I sort of knew what I was looking for which is why I'd give this joint a 3.5 out of 5 on the bar and grill category. Also, word on the street is this was the first CB and Potts. Anyone know for sure?

*5/25/2012* The Corner Office

The Corner Office is a hip little joint inside The Curtis Hotel on 14th and Curtis. It was all too fitting since I was accompanied by one of my truly best buddies, Curtis, and his fiance Tara. We made reservations to avoid the crowd and also because I'm obsessed with the OpenTable app on my phone. Anyway, the reservations were completely unnecessary. Our 7:30 dinner date was not among said crowd, but rather a few scattered couples and a bachelorette party. However, when I went to the bathroom there was a rather lively crowd in their back room; possibly a party of sorts. Regardless, the ambiance is kind of groovy (yes, I say groovy). It has a new-agey feel with lots of clean lines and bright colors. Clocks adorn the walls all reading 5:00. I wonder if they cleared that with Jimmy Buffet? So, here's the "dish" on The Corner Office

The Service: Service was excellent. Our server was a bouncy little fellow that made suggestions on the menu and seemed knowledgeable about the food. It doesn't take much to please me as far as service goes. Say hi. Answer questions. Bring food. Donezo.

What I drank: I was drinking Samurai. A rice beer from the Great Divide Brewing Company. Beer was cold and delish. I like this light summer brew as it goes with almost anything you'd want to order. I'm also a big fan of local beers. 5 stars for beverage.

What I ate: We started with their edamame. Holy acid! Those suckers were well cooked but they sauce/marinade on them was wayyyy too acidic. We decided to share entrees so we got the fish tacos, which came out first. The veggies and sauce combo were good. Crunchy fresh veg and a citrusy/creamy sauce. The fish was over battered and way too small for the size of the taco, but overall not an epic fail. We also got the lobster mac n' cheese. If they would have called it "boiled noodles with a tiny bit of lobster and a runny cheese sauce that is mostly flavorless" I wouldn't have ordered it but at least I would have known their plans back there in the kitchen. Not something I'd order again. At $21 it totally did not live up to the title. Last, we had the special. A pan seared pork chop stuffed with breading and cheese with a mushroom sauce and salad on top of greens and apples. This entree was the hit of the table. Although I never found the elusive stuffing the pork was cooked perfectly and the sauce was perfect. We skipped dessert although word on the street is that they have huge bowls of cotton candy. Um, hello!

Would I go back? Probably not. I would give it 3 out of 5 stars. They had some concepts pointing the right direction but the overall quality didn't align well with the prices. Oh, which reminds me, thanks for dinner Curtis! 

How This Works

The plan is simple here, folks. I go to restaurants. Eat. Drink. Be merry. Then, I login and tell you all about my experience at the places I visit. I can be a harsh critic, but my aim is not to endorse (or not) any specific places. I am going to start with a place I was at last night, but if some free time presents itself I may post reviews of restaurants I've already been to. If anyone is actually reading this I'd be elated at any suggestions or requests of restaurants to review. Mahalo!

My POV

Being a self-proclaimed "foodie" isn't just a fancy way of saying I sure like to eat and I'm damn good at it (although that's also true). When I say I'm an honest food critic its because I mean it. My mom doesn't run a swanky downtown grub hub that's failing, my cousin isn't an up an coming chef, my best friend isn't even a local coffee barista. When I say I'm honest it's literally because I have zero ties to the culinary world other than a passion and an opinion. My hopes for this blog are that one or two people (aside from my brother, thanks Alex) might scope this sucker out and think A. This girl is serious about dining out B. this girl has good tastes or C. This girl is a natural. I should hire her to work at "x" and do "x" for 1 billion dollars. Some say I'm a dreamer.... Anyhow, without further adieu... Welcome to ForkBook- the honest critique of Denver eateries.